NO, i'm not homeless la bodo. just that this song is stuck in my head. go listen to it. 'homeless by (my favourite) leona lewis' ITS SOOO NICE! haha. and so true. :)

i liked PE today. yea, for like the first time. so fun-ny. haha. it was the highlight of the day la. i dunno what the sport is called though. didnt realli catch it. omg. mr chua keeps calling me 'mama imma'. -_______-"""" omg. he's so lame. like so, WHATEVER! HAHA.

finally i see the rewards of my hard work for college day today. i actually felt the profits in my hands. the feeling was so 'wow'. almost magical. haha. so drama. and not onli that, we even won 'most innovative stall' award- which is an additional $80 cash. yay-ness. actually tmr supposed to go take the award during morning assembly but i dun wan la. i dun wan to take for the class. so paiseh. i prefer to stay low profile thank u v much. like chee yang said, i too popular oready. must lay low a bit. HAHA. i probably wudnt have taken no matter what the circumstances were anw- even for the fact that i have stage fright. hmmz. i wonder y.

NEXT WEEK GOT CHEM ENERGETICS TEST. omg omg omg. thats like my suckiest chem topic so far. i think if u give me chem organics i can do better than kinetics. sheesh. stupid physics must come in and ruin my life again. GRR. :(((((( and this thursday got inequality and linear equation test. omigosh. i'm so unprepared. i mean, i did practices. but i feel so unprepared. dun have the 'i can do well' feeling. I'M SO SAD. hopefully i can do well bah. i wun give up!

my two CCA's are putting so much weight on my shoulders. someone plz provide me with answers.

MJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJMJ- what if?

lurrve!

♥ 5:06 AM

its the weekend! wohooo! i've been waiting for today since sunday nite :) haha. it was definitely a very long wait but its worth it. i'm so happie no one 'disturbed' my peace today.. awww. how i wish the day cud just go on and on and on.

i got a surprise from mendaki like an hour ago. i won this study award thingy for good o lvl results. haha. i seriously think they got it wrong cuz i got a freaking 10 (with 7 distinctions). but i'm thankful to god cuz he probably knew how hard i worked. yay. i'm gonna shake hands with some minister whom i dun even noe but i dun care. haha. just looking foward to the check. fiza, can use it to buy food for our 'three months' hahahaha!

i went SHOPPING today! woohooo! so happie. i bought this really really nice summer dress. i've always wanted one and now my wish has come true! yay! i cant wait to wear it. hehe. i'm such a show off. not like i have a nice body :(

GRRR, i dun wanna do PW. i'm so dreading it man. haiz. i'll do it tmr i guess. i was supposed to do it just now but i ended up re-watching the mummy returns haha. cant be bothered la sia!

lurrve!

♥ 7:23 AM

i forgot to bring my tie thanks to TAF. instead of doing morning runs at the track, i did my morning run around the whole school. -___-" its was so difficult to find ppl with an extra tie for the simple reason that it doesnt make sense. i dun think anyone in their right mind wud want to own more than 1 tie for no reason. haha. (except if u're in TK, then if u have more than 5 ties by the end of the year, its totally understandable.) i was super lucky when alex told me he had an extra tie.! gosh. my saviour. haha. must remind me to get him something- just like the guy who found my phone. haha. :)

anw, i reached my targetted weight! WOHOOO! i'm not like officially out of TAF yet, but i will be if i maintain it for 1 week! cummon imma.! u can do it! haha. self motivation. :)

today was a very very long day. thank god for fiza's dad who sent us back home. if not i doubt i'll be able to come online by now. malay was fun. we watched movie again- actually it was a continuation of yesterdays movie. this week has been going well (so far) for me, and i hope it will continue this way.

oh, SAJC job attachment programme sucks la- to me. the job scope offered are so little. dun even have anything from the education industry, for example, relief teaching or something. haix. the one that appeals to me so far is MARKETING. haha. somehow related to the course i wanna take in uni bah. but not my future career(if i can avoid). i still dunno if i shud sign up yet cuz i wanna work at montreux again and earn some extra money. :)

i wanna go bathe then i'll start revising. NERD!

lurrve!

♥ 4:08 AM

I LOST WEIGHT! hahahahaha. i'm like below my target weight for TAF oready. super happie! omg. i cant wait for tmr morning run than i can like show off! HAHAHA. i also dunno show off to who la but still.. OMG. i'm super happie. haha. like for the first time in my life okie. for now, i just have to maintain it and lose even more. i'm super motivated now although i've been living like(according to my mother) a rabbit- with salads and grains. haha. i'll survive.

anw, one thing i have to highlight was the mendaki globalisation forum on saturday at marina mandrin hotel. firstly, THE HOTEL IS DAMN NICE!. haha. it was a 5-star hotel with all the huge chandeliers and plants and everything. i wish i cud stay there man. i envy all the tourists/locals? who stay dere la. hmmp. anw, back to the forum, I LOVED IT. they talk mostly about overseas study and close friends should know that i'm realli crazie into the whole 'studying abroad' thing. and i met an LSE graduate!!!!!!!! argh!. my future school. haha. i wish!.

i havent been in the best of mood the whole of last week and i realli hope it will improve this week becuz i think somehow my stress/mood is directly related to my pimple outbreak. HOLY! i'm like such a nerd. how can i even say 'directly related'. shitz. someone give me a slap plz. haha. i cant believe how much i've changed since secondary school(not like i wasnt already a nerd back in secondary school-___-")

i want my 'old'life back- even though it has onli been 7 months.

imma

PS: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE HELP ME DL LEONA LEWIS'S WHOLE ALBUM. PLEASE?!! i'm dying just going to youtube to listen everyday. thanks. i love u (whoever that helps me dl ONLY). haha. <-- so childish. i noe rite durh. i'm imma-ture. sheesh. talking nonsense oready. better go. i wanna write for my "mortal" friend a letter. :)

♥ 3:42 AM

omg. my oreo cheesecake taste super weird. HAHA.
another failed attempt i guess. but its farnie. it tastes super erm, farnie? i kinda taste slightly bitter. my best guess is becuz there was too much cream cheese. and the semi-sweet chocolate didnt help. the texture is perfect. just the taste is slightly off. it looks and smell super good but yea, the taste, which is like the most important thing. haha. nvm. i shall get victims to try it out tmr. :) delia, eunice, jannah, u better try! haha. even if u dun wan, i'll just force it down ur throats. haha.

anw, i totally lost my mood to study this week. need to take a break so that i wun be soo moody this coming week. haix. i still cant stand "that" person man. like my hatred for u is like 100% plus overflow ar. sorrie delia and eunice, have to endure my cursing everytime he's close. HE'S JUST SO IRRITATING. omg. joel, plz help me punch his face. no wait, dun even dirty ur hands. this type of ppl are not worth it.

i need to exercise. my cake has made me fat

lurrve!

♥ 2:14 AM

yay! i'm officially a mendaki volunteer.! after much courage and self-motivation. :)
i'm glad i went for the volunteer orientation session today. the orientation crew realli did a good job in making the volunteers feel safe and comfortable with one another.

i was super scared to go in at first. i was like sms the whole world and trying to convince myself that there was nuthink to be afraid off. haha.to those i've messaged, yea, u were one of the people in the whole world. in the end, i went to the siglap park connector area behind wisma mendaki to sit cuz i didnt dare go in when i walked past the building the first time. HAHA. suddenly a girl came and asked me how to go to mendaki (it is very deep inside. v easy to get lost). and that girl became my first mendaki volunteer friend. haha. her name's radiah and she's slightly older than me. we sticked to each other most of the time. oh gosh. many people were late la. i think instead of starting at 2, we started like 2.45pm and people were still coming in at 3.30. haha. but we started without them. i was the youngest there surprisingly. a lot of them were in their earlie twenties. we played many many ice breaker games which were kind of common but imagine playing the squirrel and tree game with a mak cik. yea. that was kind of weird. and she was super enthu summore. HAHAHA. i cant wait for my first volunteer job.!!

omg. i'm super broke. i spent like all my money on my baking stuff and i'm super broke now. haix. i guess i have an expensive hobbie. but not as expensive as my brother's, whose hobbie is trying to make his car look at "cool" as possible. haha.

anw, i got back my geog and econs result. so left gp results that i havent get back. i think the teachers like give back according to the order that i do well in. realli. like they gave back chem first(which was my best), than all my B results and finally econs. so dammit. i guess my gp sucked. hahaha. geog results was totally unexpected. i cant believe they moderated my marks from 23/24 to 16/24. WTH! i almost got full marks b4 moderation and i ended up with a freaking B. haix. just my luck. -____-". oh well. at least i didnt fail.(which i noe is a wrong mindset). i got nuthing to say for econs la. i know i can do so much better. even ms hon noes. she came up to me and said somethings which was kind of moving but i noe better. my time management sucked which contributed a lot to my sucky results. haix. i need to shut the talk and start writing man. if onli i can write as fast as i type. hahaha.

its not impossible.

lurrve!

ps: i'm gonna bake my oreo cheesecake tmr! i cant wait. hope it turns out well man. wasted so much money.!! :(

♥ 7:02 AM

I WENT BACK TO TK. like omg. after sooooooooo long. i realli miss it A LOT! i actually forgot that i was supposed to go back today but thank god for cherie, i DID! haha.

i guess i was one of the lucky ones to be able to go to such a reputable school like tk. one thing for sure, tk taught me to MUG. haha. blardy mugger school. even the mats/bengs/minahs/lians are muggers. and i super love the environment- its super safe compared to some schools. I LOVE TK! haha. not forgetting the friends that i've made in tk.

AHMAD ZHAFIR AND LINDA YO, I MISS U GUYS LIKE CRAZIE. POWERPUFFS! haha.

anw, school ended way earlie for me today thanks to the chinese students who went off for oral. yay. but the sad thing is, tmr must stay back for chem SPA. sianx. i've been so moody these past few days. i guess its cuz i'm pretty tired. i hope to regain energy this weekend. haha. so please bear with me. tmr last day... haha.

let me skip to the journey to and from tk. fiza and i were crazie as usual. talked nonsense to the max man. anw, we came up with the super irritating phrase that was inspired by our long lost friend. here it goes..

" 100% confirm, plus chop, plus guarentee, plus receipt, plus insurance, plus thumbprint, plus signature, plus stamp, plus SEALED!"

super lame!! we were so free la. haiyoo. and u noe what, i cant realli say it fast. twisted tongue. HAHA. and i came up with this weird theory from dunno where that if u're mature means u have uglie hair. like wtf. i also dunno y i said that. HAHAHA. i think this is the reason y i love fiza so much. she makes me feel like i can be myself anywhere and anytime. i dun have to hide anything from her or do anything that i dun like. kudoos to our friendship! may it last all the way to london!

lurrve!

♥ 4:08 AM

i need to lose 900g to be out of TAF and i think i just gained like 900g instead. HAHAHA. happie ar. less than 1kg. omg. like the first time i'll actually be "out" of TAF. HAHAHA. although i'm out becuz i reach my targetted weight and not ideal weight, i still feel super happie. must eat more fish. boost metabolism. and eat less meat. but.... MEAT IS MY FAVOURITE!!! hmmm. i guess all the unhealthy food is the best. haha. but fast foods are so no no! FATTENING, rite delia? hahaha. faster go buy weighing scale with me la loser...! haha.

anw, i need a break from school man. like i noe its too earlie to be feeling this way, but seriously, i need one super badly. especially PW. haiyaa. dun wan say la. later ppl get offended. sbs.

IMMA NEEDS A LIFE.

lurrve.

♥ 7:38 AM

I LOVE JANNAH'S CHEESECAKE. haha. thats like the best part of the class outing. =X
hmm. we didnt realli do much but i kinda had fun in the beginning. haha. the whole class was late as usual so chee yang, nitin, anqi, delia and i went first to 'chop' a spot. haha. WE WERE SO CUKOO! HAHA. we were acting like freaking tourist the moment we reached there la. and i was soooo not surpised when we alighted at the wrong station. haha. we alighted at imbiah instead of beach station when the station name was already so freaking obvious. its BEACH station for a reason la. omg. its suppose to take u to the BEACH! lamao. hahahaha. crazie ppl.

so we took the best out of the wrong station and took picture with the merlion and the waterfall at the base of the merlion! hahaha. so cute. we got REAL tourist to help us take photos. a bit malu la. but hey, i go to sentosa like twice a year or something. summore with different grps of friends. must understand our cukoo-ness. haha.

DELIA GOT DUNKED AND IT WAS ALL MY IDEA! haha. that loser. walao. chee yang damn strong la. just carry her whole. like omg. the reason?'oh, i'm a dancer. i carry people' erm, ok chee. that was a lil freaky but i get what u mean. haha. poor delia. playing in the water was fun.
the were a lot a lot of food. omg. jannah was the master chef that day- with lagsana and cheesecake. super nice. haha. i shud learn to cook from her instead of always failing. hahaha.

DIE took many many photos. like SUPER A LOT. but i think like 80% all delia's photo. so erm, ya. ... super tired after that. then went to subway and ate a mini sub. i like the size. it was just nice. haha. next time dun wan buy 6 inch anymore. haha. must diet sia. now then i remember what i wanna buy at watsons la delia. i wanted to buy a weighing scale. i came back and read my personal message than i realised. hahaha. dammit. later must go buy.

anw, can someone please explain chem kinetics (1) to me. i lazy to read the notes. -___-"

lurrve!

♥ 6:15 PM

COLLEGE DAY IS OVER. I AM SO FREAKING HAPPIE. OMG. i have been dreaming for this day since the idea was brought up. i believe i did a lot even if ppl dun think so and i'm freaking proud of myself to be able to make it into a big success. i will nv forget and truly appreciated those who have helped me along the way-delia, eunice especially for tolerating my angry outbursts throughout the preparations. oh, btw, need another help from u guys, just dun tell them what i said. haha. not forgetting natasha and sin yee for helping me with the budget and preparation and enduring all the confusing price changes. hope u guys learn to take risks next time. haha. dun be so pessimistic la. hehe. jk jk. dun angry okie. business is like that one. and also the decoration team for helping in the decorations? it was super nice seriously. hmm. now all i have to do is the budget count and the street market thing better not disturb me forever man. if not i will scream until everyone goes deaf.

the below part is for people who deserve it.

NOTICE/ATTENTION:
I AM SO FREAKING TIRED AND NO ONE IS LETTING ME REST. I FEEL SO MISERABLE PEOPLE. CAN U PLEASE LEAVE ME ALONE! I MEAN IT. LIKE PLEASE, I'M BEGGING U. LEAVE ME ALONEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! I NEED PEACE AND QUIET. I NEED TO REST. I AM HUMAN JUST LIKE U. AND I AM ONE DYING HUMAN. DYING OF INSANITY. FROM EVERYTHING THAT I HAVE TO DO. SOMETIMES I JUST FEEL LIKE SCREAMING AND CRYING BUT I CANT BECAUSE I AM IMMA AND PEOPLE THINK I AM THE INVINCIBLE WOMAN. I CAN DO EVERYTHING U ALL CANT. WHERE IS THE JUSTICE? PLEASE FREAKING LEAVE ME ALONE. EVERYBODY. I WANT TO BE ALONE!!!!!!!!!

once again, i beg u. please dun disturb or bother me anymore. no wait. dont PRETEND to want to help if u dun want to. maybe that will make me feel better. i dun understand y i always have to do the JOBS OF OTHERS. and if u feel guilty, THATS GOOD BECUZ U SHUD. i just need u to understand that I NEVER WANNA LOOK AT YOUR FACES. if u noe u cant take responsibility then DONT. in this world NOTHING IS FREE. and i definately AM NOT working for free.

just go away.......................

-

♥ 1:24 AM

my patience is slowing evolving to frustration. haix. so many things are happening and sadly i find it so difficult to catch up. sometimes acting blur is the best solution. haha.

i was quite happie and jovial in the morning even though i had a malay lesson. It was a last minute mock oral for preparation of the real thing in the afternoon. cikgu was quite nice and she gave me a relatively easy topic to talk about. i tot i did quite well then. i read with ease and my fluency for conversation was commendable. but things were very different in the real exam. i must have screwed up big time. its like my brain suddenly froze. i noe it was a make or break situation when i was sitting in the examiners office and sadly, i think it was more on the break side. i kept thinking of english words and my mind dont realli translate well when i'm nervous or stressed up. I USED TWO ENGLISH WORDS when cikgu already said not to use any AT ALL. omg omg. and my points were super shallow. the question was 'is health and education a priority in a person's life' and 'how can u invest in health and education to make it better' or something along that line. omg!!! i panicked man cuz the work that they used i cudnt understand. haha. so i asked the teacher to define the word for me. haix. SCREWED. to think i was quite confident.

anw, college day is also screwed. i dunno y now got so many changes? its like so freaking last minute. and they expect us to do everything. and all the planning i did in the past, i realised that i shudnt have. was a total waste of my time when it isnt at all like my plan anymore? shud have started earlier and saved me all the trouble. i'm super scared i wun get my money back cuz apparently i have met ppl who borrows but dun return- these ppl are like everywhere now. what is the world becoming nowadays?!! i'm SUPER scared. someone plz save me.

lurrve!

♥ 7:44 AM

Pocket full of Sunshine- Natasha Beddingfield
I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine.
I got a love, and I know that it's all mine.
Oh. Woah

Do what you want, but you're never gonna break me.
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me.
No. Woah

I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine.
I got a love, and I know that it's all mine.
Oh. Woah ohhhhhh.

Wish that you could, but you ain't gonna own me.
Do anything you want, you cant slow me down.
Oh, no.

Take me away: A secret place.
A sweet escape: Take me away.
Take me away to better days.
Take me away: A hiding place.

I got a pocket, got a pocketful of sunshine.
I got a love, and I know that it's all mine.
Oh. Woah
Do what you want, but you're never gonna break me.
Sticks and stones are never gonna shake me.
No. Woah

Take me away: A secret place.
A sweet escape: Take me away.
Take me away to better days.
Take me away: A hiding place

There's a place that I go,But nobody knows.
Where the rivers flow,And I call it home.
And there's no more lies.
In the darkness, there's light.
And nobody cries.
There's only butterflies.

Take me away: A secret place.
A sweet escape: Take me away.
Take me away to better days.
Take me away: A hiding place.

Take me away: A secret place.
A sweet escape: Take me away.
Take me away to better days.
Take me away: A hiding place.

The sun is on my side.
Take me for a ride.
I smile up to the sky.
I know I'll be all right.

The sun is on my side.
Take me for a ride.
I smile up to the sky.
I know I'll be all right.

Today is another boring boring day. I didnt go for malay today- something which i wun regret. even if i go, she wudnt be doing anything so i find it more purposeful to use the time to eat and do college day stuff. haha. so attitude sia. to think my alvl oral is tmr. :(

anw, i'm so happie that my mentoring gifts proposal got selected. haha. at least something is off my shoulders. i just have to carry it out. its not that difficult so shud be okie. hmm. now i'm left with college day.

i went to buy containers for the fries and nacho's just now. i bought 300 pieces, some satay sticks and forks and it costs like $40 already. like omg. to think i put max $8. haix. must sacrifise some stuff oready. i realli pitied myself on the journey home la. i had like two huge bags of containers that i was so busy tripping and hitting ppl with. and the SUPER LONG bus ride didnt help although i managed to nap awhile. i kept leaning sideways. no idea why. and the stupid bus kept BLASTING the message for the ppl to move in. super loud la. not happie sia.

i dun feel like going to school tmr!! omg. but got stupid malay oral. i think i'm gonna screw it big time. but deep in my heart, i'm praying that the opposite will happen. haha. like no matter how much i hate the subject, i still wanna at least pass la. haix. i got to go nw. i need to finish up my malay homework. see u soon

lurrve!

♥ 5:07 AM